Texas TPA Purchases Entire City

waringA large Texas TPA has announced the purchase of the city of Waring, Texas.  City officials say the sale was in response to an eroding tax base and high debt. Waring was settled by Bosnian Serbs in the mid 1800’s.

Mayor Reeken  Brucesoovitch  attended a press conference today on the front porch of Bennies Bar and Grill. “It’s great, I think” noted Brucesoovitch. “It’s great, really great” he repeated over and over again as he sipped a Whatchcallthisdrink”, a Bennies specialty.

Alderman Kendrew Jacksonavich added “It’s a brilliant move making this announcement on April Fools Day. I like it!”

Dod Nolanovich, Bennies customer representative, interrupted and announced free Coors Lite to all attendees.  The press conference ended quickly and the celebrations began in earnest.

Editor’s Note:  Molly Mulebriar, feared investigative reporterette and an infrequent contributor to this blog is from Waring and attests to the accuracy of this report.