By Pinnochio
In a late midnight session Congress passed an amendment to the 1964 Civil Rights Act mandating a seismic change affecting the American insurance industry.
“Insurance is a civil right!” said Hermann Cortez – D-Tx, sponsor of the amendment. “This gifts to all Americans equal protection under the law. Now, for the first time, all Americans, white, black, pink and blue can be made whole even if they have a pre-existing condition!”
Randy Riggs, R-Guam, concurs. “This is a bi-partisan effort to win more votes in the upcoming midterms. A vote against civil rights is a death sentence, principles be damned!”
The Property Casualty Affordable Care Amendment (PCACA) requires all Americans to purchase auto and home insurance even if they don’t own or need one or face punishing government sanctions.
Rodney Johnson, Speaker of the House, in a rare midnight interview, was asked why he supported the amendment. “Any bill with the words ‘Civil Rights” in it has to be good. I didn’t read the amendment nor did anyone else before it passed because we had to pass it before we can read it. That’s a long established tradition here on The Hill .”
Key provision of the amendment requires all pre-existing conditions to be covered immediately whenever a loss occurs. “It’s unfair to require Americans to purchase insurance that doesn’t pay. For too long property and casualty insurance companies have denied clams due to pre-existing conditions! This amendment prevents them from doing that anymore” said Sonny Davis, a civil rights activist in Buffalo Breath, Montana.
The “PCACA FOR ALL AMERICANS (PCACAFAA) Coalition has been pushing for this for years. It’s time to come together, rejoice for salvation is here!” said Wolf Wederstein, a professor at Harvard.
The Congressional Budget Office expects funding to come from somewhere. Reporters overheard the Speaker of The House on a hot mike whisper to his aide “Tell Bernie to fire up the printing presses and don’t forget to buy ink in bulk.”
Red ink sales are expected to reach new highs. “The good news is there is no shortage of red ink!” stated the president’s press secretary during today’s press conference. “We ran out of black ink years ago.“
